Dec 192013

image.axdInteresting perspective from Dale Koppel!

1. You are in control.

You can pick and choose who you want to contact, and you have the opportunity to be very selective.

2. The sky’s the limit. Part 1online-dating-advice-3

Where else can you be exposed to so many eligible (except for the ones who lie) members of the opposite sex in such a brief period of time with a whole resume of pertinent information?

Think about how many times you go to the supermarket hoping you’ll meet a cute guy/girl and you’ll strike up a conversation about cauliflower, and that person is actually there.

3. The sky’s the limit. Part 2

Think of it like a numbers game. Like playing the One-Arm Bandit. The more quarters you put into the machine, the greater your chance of winning the jackpot. The more people you meet online, the closer you are to meeting the right one, to hitting the jackpot. You never know how long it will take, so you could a) get frustrated, and keep going or b) get frustrated and give up. Hey, it’s not like you’re running out of quarters. (See below.) Point in fact: It took me 3 years to meet the man I ended up marrying two years later. It took him 3 months to meet me.

4. It’s cheap.

Some online dating sites are free. They’re definitely less expensive than memberships in dating companies. Some people say you get what you pay for. I’ve known people with success stories from every online dating site. Here’s one way to figure out how inexpensive they actually are: How much do you spend on drinks when you go to a bar trying to find someone? Times how many drinks per month. Now compare costs.

5. You can do it naked.

When I was doing online dating, I would spend about two hours (usually late at night with no, or only the skimpiest of clothes on) searching for eligible men (my criteria included age range and geographic distance). In that period of time, I could troll through well over 100 men (some repeats, of course), click on only (time-saver) the ones that looked interesting, if their profile was interesting, I’d shoot them a “generic, but catchy” email, then wait for a response.

I’d usually end up at the end of the two hours having sent out 50 or so emails, received about 25 responses, contact about 10 of them over the phone (not emails or texts; you MUST get a sense of a person over the phone; it’s amazing how many will turn you off, and you will politely say, “It was nice talking to you, but I don’t think we’re a match.” Out of the 10, I’d probably want to meet about half; half of that didn’t want to meet me, so I’d end up with two “meets.” If neither made me want to see him again (or vice versa), it was “back to the drawing board. Another two hours of naked trolling.